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Donald vs Cancer Pt. III – Candice Nyan: Angel Of Hope

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In my bedroom, alone, flooded with tears in the dark I reached out and found someone who lit a path so bright you’d need sunglasses.
That person was Candice Nyan, who I have deemed my Angel of Hope.

Candice was the only person I’d ever seen in my life go up against cancer in a way like never before. If you ever knew her through her treatment without her telling you, you’d think you were watching a “normal” person simply live their life.

In fact after I told my mother and manager she was the first person I reached out to. One thing I try to do is calculate the future.  I had so many questions, so many doubts, so many fears to face. What if I could conquer some of those things even before they arrived? Surely this oncoming war would be less of a fight.

I remember asking questions like:
What does chemo feel like?
Does having a port bother you?
What side effects will I have?
How do you continue to live life through treatment?
What happens when you’re by yourself when everyone is gone?

Like a true champion she knocked those questions down with elegance and simplicity.

The two answers that stood out the most were the latter two. She said that you don’t stop living life just because you have cancer, you keep moving forward. When I’m by myself is when I hear God the most!

I just sat there looking at my phone still very puzzled at this young lady’s answers.

ATTITUDE: this was going to be one of the biggest factors on how to overcome this obstacle.

Many of days we checked in on each other as I began my treatments.
The only way I can really describe this woman is analagous to Daniel being in the fire but not consumed by it. Here I saw this young lady standing in the fire..but looking at her on the outside she was not consumed by it. In the midst of being in the fire she helped me get ready for the fire that was to come.

As I write this blog entry and look back over this, Candice was extremely strong! Far stronger than I am, she was. To have to deal with your own life and it’s chaos, you sacrificed your time, your emotional and spiritual energy to help me. I’ll never forget what you did for me. You taught me how to live!
——

The following day I went to coach morning class as usual and worked out by myself. I remember it like it was yesterday. I sat there on the bench trying to catch my breath. I yelled out in anger for what seemed an eternity. Hot tears and sweat poured over my face.

Then I did something strange, something I’d never done before in my life.

I had a conversation with Satan…